Year 2020, Skill #26: Admit When Things Are Messy

I am sorry to say so, but, sadly, it’s true, that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you —Dr. Seuss in Oh, The Places You’ll Go!

Okay. Things are really messy here at MessyMarvelous, and we decided to just admit that. Well, maybe not so messy as they are ridiculously busy and challenging. Rhea is in the throes of teaching four college classes in the hybrid model, (who invented this?) and Amy is barely keeping her head above water with increasing demands at the office, (and this will get worse the longer the pandemic goes on) and taking over the lead on the soon-to-be-public project that we are working on. So we are both chanting Dory’s line from the Disney Pixar classic Finding Nemo, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming…”

So Proud

Also, last week Rhea gave a lecture sponsored by the University of South Carolina’s Honor’s College.  Students nominate professors, one of whom is then selected by the committee to give a “Last Lecture“.  The Last Lecture is meant to give the professor a chance to state publicly the life lessons most important to them. Rhea gave this lecture Monday evening. Her topic was How Will You Cope, and you can watch the lecture here. We are super proud of her!

You, Too?

We are assuming there are times you feel like you are barely keeping your head above water, too. We both know so many people who feel like they are barely holding on. So what are we to do? Start singing! Take Dory’s advice, and do something that adds a little joy and a lot of distraction to your mess. Last week, I (Amy) got overwhelmed with a technology situation, and after I cried and cursed a bit, I decided I needed to do something more tangible and sensate. So I baked some blueberry bars, played the piano, and vacuumed. And that worked. I admitted to myself that I was in a mess, and decided to do my Dory version of “and we sing….”.  Rhea’s version of this was to sweep her porch and repair her screens before settling into recording more lectures.

So, Friends. This is short and sweet. Admit it when you are in a mess. Just keep swimming. AND, do something completely different.

If you missed it last week, we have a video up on Instagram. And there will be more of those this week. Please follow us there, and share the MessyMarvelous message.

A Little Treat

We are going to leave you with a poignant poem by a favorite poet of ours. It was sent to me by a friend who was reaching out to send me some kindness. We think it speaks exactly to what this post is about. This photo was sent to Rhea by another friend to share some joy. Gosh we’ve got good friends!

Life is Messy. Yes it is. And it is Marvelous, too. Just keep singing. Keep being kind. Keep believing that we will get through this together.

Allow  Danna Faulds, Go In and In: Poems from the Heart of Yoga

There is no controlling life.
Try corralling a lightning bolt,
containing a tornado. Dam a
stream and it will create a new
channel. Resist, and the tide
will sweep you off your feet.
Allow, and grace will carry
you to higher ground. The only
safety lies in letting it all in –
the wild and the weak; fear,
fantasies, failures and success.
When loss rips off the doors of
the heart, or sadness veils your
vision with despair, practice
becomes simply bearing the truth.
In the choice to let go of your
known way of being, the whole
world is revealed to your new eyes.

Amy & Rhea

Amy has a private practice of individual psychotherapy and marriage counseling in Columbia, SC. A few years ago her book, Moment to Moment: The Transformative Power of Everyday Life, won Spirituality and Health’s top 100 books of the year.  She is passionate about many things in life, but especially about psychology, spirituality, dancing, cooking, marriage, family, friends, writing, traveling, and learning. www.amysandermontanez.comYou can email her  at [email protected].

Rhea is a Licensed Psychologist, persistent woman, mother of 2 amazing young women, writer, teacher, life-long learner, curious & creative human, lover of life, passionate about making life better every day. Visit her outdated website at ramphd.com or email me at [email protected]